Worst ‘Date’ Ever

I just had to share my horrible match.com ‘date’ story. We planned to meet for lunch but since my ‘date’ was fasting I suggested Whole Foods so we could get juice drinks. I assumed we would get drinks and then sit down and talk for a while. But nooooooo! My ‘date’ arrives and grabs a shopping cart so he can shop for his fast. At this point the ‘date’ was already over in my mind but I wasn’t sure how to bug out so I suffered through a few minutes of getting my own juice drink and watching him shop while we tried to have a conversation. This ‘date’ couldn’t have ended soon enough for me. Note to men: A date is a chance for you to woo a woman and show some interest. Not a chance for you to get chores done! Thankfully I never heard from him again since I assume ‘date’ number 2 would be watching him clean is toilet.

Since I try to end on a positive note I will add that I did find a new tea while I was shopping and I really like it a lot. So something good besides a funny blog story came out of this ‘date’.

Cat “NEXT!” Cathy

My Brain Hurts

There was a time long ago when humans thought the world was flat and a much more recent time when humans thought that you did not create new brain cells during your life. I recently read an interesting article on keeping your brain active and it turns out your brain can and does create new brain cells! This should be particularly good news to those who may have slightly abused this vital organ in their youth.

The most interesting part to me was that new mental exercises were needed to get the benefit. If you do crosswords and that’s all you’ve done for many years you are not getting as much benefit. You need to try a new mental activity to stimulate new pathways and new growth.

As it turns out I guess all my different hobbies have been helping me more than I ever knew. I encourage everyone to try a new recipe, drive down a new street, read a new book, talk to new people or whatever novel things you can think of to get those brain cells a pumping!

Cat “duh” Cathy

Feeling Positive

I was convinced to do a positive list. It’s a list of all the good things you like about yourself. Apparently it is not a good idea to concentrate on the negative things you don’t like….something I always did. Apparently you have to accept and love yourself the way you are and then you can grow from there. Or so I’ve been told.

So I did my positive list and it was a lot of fun. I liked thinking about my good things instead of my bad. Just making the list put me in a happy mood. And then I asked a good friend what he thought and he gave me a few more items for my list. His items were very nice and made me smile. It was nice that he saw all these good qualities in me while I was picking away at my less than girly wardrobe, bad hair days, temper…ok not allowed to think of these any more. Just the happy happy joy joy things.

Anyway I was told it takes about 6 months for this to become a pattern. So I’m going to try it. I have my positive list and I will see if I can think about these good things instead of the bad and accept myself as I am and see where it goes from there. I will keep you posted on any progress I make. In the meantime I’d suggest this activity to everyone. It’s a nice way to see yourself in a positive light. And if you have a BFF or boyfriend you can ask them too and get more input and maybe form a closer relationship in the process.

Cat “Sending Positive Vibes” Cathy

On The Line Dating

As I blogged about before I am single and using online dating services. I like it as a way to meet people you may not meet otherwise and have more options on who to date. While I work, blog, sleep and play my dating profiles are out there working for me. I met my last three boyfriends online so it has pretty much become standard practice for me now. As an ‘expert’ I thought I’d share some of my advice to other women looking for love:

-Ignore the large cut and paste emails that say generic things and include summaries of what is already in their profile. Instead concentrate on the emails that seem more genuine and personalized. I believe a guy who is really looking is going to do a search and narrow down the choice to a few good women and then send out a few emails. Mass emailing to see who replies is lame and impersonalized IMHO.

-I usually do not do searches for guys. I wait for them to contact me. At times I’ve gotten disappointed and did my own search and emailed or winked. My response rate is about 1%. You would think I was contacting Brad Pitt types based on my bad return…but I wasn’t. If I see someone I really think I’d like the most I will do now is wink or a quick note just in case. But responses are rare and try not to take it personally. I tell myself I’m just not what they are looking for and I want a guy who digs me and wants me.

-I don’t like to waste a lot of time emailing and then texting and then talking on the phone and then finally meet. You really don’t know what you are getting into until you meet so I just prefer a few quick emails, then one phone call and then a date. The profile is just a way to see if they meet your basic requirements and you won’t know if you are attracted or intrigued until you meet. It’s sad to get your hopes up and then meet and realize they are nothing like what you imagined in your head or what their profile led you to believe.

-When you make the first call try to schedule a first date if you still want to meet after you have talked for a bit. I’ve had hour long conversations and they seemed to go well. At the end of the call we’d decided to talk again since a date wasn’t able to be scheduled. Not many of these potential matches ever called back. So schedule the date during the first call and make it within a few days of the call if at all possible.

-First dates should be very simple due to not having a clue what you are getting in to. I recommend a lunch. That way you meet in a public place and there is no pressure to spend more than an hour together. If it goes well and he seems safe then you can plan more elaborate future dates.

-If he suggests more of a meet and greet with a coffee or drink I’d probably skip. To me that means he is not very interested. If he really thinks you are what he is looking for he will be open to at least a lunch meeting.

-If you meet and you are not sure and he calls for a second date I say go for it. Sometimes people are nervous or just not having a good day. As long as you were undecided a second date is a good idea. If you know there is absolutely no way you would be interested than skip the second date but otherwise take a chance.

-I say let him plan the first few dates. This is a time where he should be wooing you. You just need to show up, have fun, be yourself and be nice.

This is my best advice and I hope it helps some of the women out there. Of course I am still single so maybe I’m not the best person to be giving advice. Guys feel free to let me know if you have any input or your own guidelines.

Cat “Wink Wink Nudge Nudge” Cathy

Wave Dazed

2010 has been a lame year for vacations but I did manage to take a short trip to Virginia Beach Virginia for a stand up Jet Ski event called Wave Daze. The event is called a ‘Freeride’ so basically lots of stand up riders meet to ride together and show off and have fun but it’s not a competition.

Even though I was there for the Jet Ski event I didn’t want to spend the whole time jet skiing. The first day was cold, dreary and rough water so I decided to explore a bit instead of getting wet. The Neptune festival …whatever that is…had taken place the weekend before so there was lots of awesome sandcastle art work. I was really impressed with the Neptune Sandcastle but I can’t help but wonder if giving him bunny ears in my picture upset the god of water just a wee a bit and caused our rough water weekend.

After the sand castle viewing I put on my inline skates and went out to explore. Virginia Beach was pretty but very touristy with nothing but T-shirt shops, hotels and restaurants. While exploring I noticed odd signs at almost every intersection that seemed to be saying ‘no cursing’. I found out later that I was correct and the city several years back had made a no cursing law and actually enforced it. Much like getting a speeding ticket on a bicycle the thought of getting a cursing ticket was almost appealing to me as a way to have bragging rights with my friends. I wondered how this law was enforced. What if you cursed in another language…would they know…could they still ticket you? Enquiring minds want to know. I was thinking I’d learn some obscure bushman curse words and be able to skirt the system that way. Plus the whole idea of a town that doesn’t like cursing but it’s ok to buy t-shirts that say “My Pen Is Huge” and “The person wearing this shirt is an emergency worker just lay on your back and do whatever he tells you” seems like an odd contrast and a wee bit hypocritical to me.

I spent a lot of time in my skates exploring and blading up and down the boardwalk. Thankfully it was off season since I heard it gets really crowded during season and I wouldn’t have been able to skate like I did. There was a really strong north wind so the skate out was hard but the skate back was way too easy. I wish I had my gps since I’m sure my speed was approaching mach 1. I would use my skates often during the long weekend to get around and explore and I even had a chance to do a night skate thanks to the ample lighting on the boardwalk.

I was intrigued by the free hugs t-shirts for sale. I’ve watched the YouTube videos on this and was quite taken by the kinship it showed so I bought a bunch of them for all my girlfriends. I’m just hoping they lead to a fun experience and not some rude comments like ‘what else do you do for free’. I’ll keep you posted on the outcome of those t-shirts.

Since the weekend was on the beach some kite practice was in order. I flew at night one time. It was my first night time flight experience and I liked it since I didn’t have to stare directly into the blazing sun like I usually do. I flew one day too and the wind was perfect. I was being dragged on my feet through the sand 10 feet or so and it was a great upper body workout. I’m still a long way from being an expert in this sport but I did feel more confident than most of my flying experiences.

And finally since it was a Jet Ski event I borrowed one and thrashed in the waves for a bit. The waves were rough and the ski was set up differently than I am used to but it was still a blast, I didn’t get hurt and I didn’t break the ski. So I’d consider that a good day of riding!

Cat “Dazed and Confused” Cathy

Circus School

As part of my ‘try everything once’ philosophy I recently ran away to join the circus. Ok not really but I did start circus school and I liked it so much I now attend almost weekly. I’m learning aerial silk. You can see what it is in the pictures but basically it is a sexy upper body workout with a fun height component to it.

I’ve met several other girls doing this new hobby of mine. They all seem very sweet and it’s nice making new friends. I’m probably old enough to be the mother of most of them but so what, I’m glad I’m still healthy enough to enjoy fun activities like this.

Our instructor is sweet in a boot camp sort of way. She is Russian and I think she was born into the circus industry since she mentioned 6 hour days training on the aerial silk. I get a kick out of her strong Russian accent as she tells us ‘you must stretch more’ and then she sits on your back to help. Since it’s supposed to be artistic she tells us ‘point your toes’. I’m still just struggling to hold my weight and pull myself up so I’m not really too worried about pointed toes and being pretty at this stage.

It’s way fun and I love having something new to learn and look forward to. Take a chance and try something new too!

Cat “Hanging Around” Cathy

Ometepe Island Nicaragua - The End of Our Adventure

Our final stop in Nicaragua was Ometepe Island. A pretty figure 8 shaped island with a volcano on each end located in Lake Nicaragua. The only way to the island is by ferry and it is a must see for any trip to Nicaragua in my not so humble opinion.

The island was beautiful and lush…from the active volcano I assume. The only thing that could have made this place prettier would be clearer water. The water is just a brownish color and not the pretty blue hues you get in the ocean.

We rented motorcycles to explore the island for two days. We saw springs, hiked to a waterfall, saw lovely views of the volcanos from every angle and just enjoyed taking in the local color. Never have I felt safer on a motorcycle. There are very few cars on the island so all I had to worry about was other motorcycles, holes in the road, school children, pigs with piglets suckling, chickens, cowboys, farmers with machetes, rocks….I seriously did encounter all of these and at times it felt like it would make for a good video game but somehow this just felt like part of the adventure and added to the experience.

One night we were walking around one of the small towns feeling like we were on quite an adventure. Most people didn’t speak English and we didn’t speak Spanish. We had not hot water and our power would go out for an hour or so during the almost nightly storms. It was quite a rustic and foreign feel until we stumbled upon a bar and looked in the window. They had a television and it was playing an Orlando Magic basketball game! I was shocked and actually disappointed but also thought it was funny and reminded me of how small a world it actually is.

Another small world experience came when I ran over cow manure in another small village. I stopped to clean it off my bike before it could get on me and music was playing. Not native or local music but a sappy American love song from the 70’s. What a contrast this song was to my surroundings!

The people on this island were so friendly. At one point a man with a machete yelled at me. But it wasn’t an angry yell it was more of a ‘hey lookout’ best I could tell. So I asked my (now ex) boyfriend “honey, the nice man with the machete is yelling at me, should I stop?” We kept going but soon a whole village was yelling at me. I decided there must be some issue like a huge drop ahead so I better stop and see what all the commotion is about. It turns out my battery had come lose from my motorcycle and was flopping around. The cutest young teenager helped me tie up the battery so I could finish my ride while the whole village watched. It was the excitement for the day for us and it seemed for them as well.

Since the battery was just roped in it was no longer starting my motorcycle and I had to kick start it. Not a big problem but it was taking me a few times to get it going. At one point we stopped in the rain to decide how to get back to the hotel. I was having trouble starting my motorcycle and a local man got out of his truck in the rain and kick started it for me! I was shocked at this gesture and the friendliness of everyone on the island. I almost hate to go back since I’m worried with time they will become jaded from tourists and the nice feel I had there will be gone.

As a final note to our adventurous stay in Nicaragua we were stopped by cops yet again while on the way to the airport. At first we were nervous since we were running late but we finally figured out they wanted us to buy a ticket to something equivalent to the policeman’s ball. Well we would do anything not to miss our plane and especially since they were carrying big guns. As it turns out it cost about $2 for the tickets and we laughed saying it was a bargain at twice the price. And so ended the most extreme vacation I’d ever taken….I can’t wait to do it again!

Cat “Ometepe on my mind” Cathy